[ Mama Memos ]

Five months ago... I was anticipating the most amazing gift I have ever been given.

I used to sit and rock and just day dream in Breck's room.

 I would look at his canvas, painted with love by Daddy, and wonder if Breck would even notice it, and wonder if he would like it. (Little did I know, that he would be mesmerized by it. It's reminds him of his familiarities and symbolizes his little world of comfort.)

 I would "touch" my baby and dream. Just the skin of my womb came between the palm of my hand and his sweet, unborn body. I would try to imagine that there, right there, in that brand new crib would soon be my sleeping baby boy. Unreal. It seemed as though somehow it wasn't really going to be; that I would have to continue dreaming it all up in my head. It seemed to be forever an untouchable thing. It felt like I was so close but yet so far away from being a mama. He couldn't come quick enough, but yet at the same time... oh, how I would miss those sweet flutters, jabs, floats, and rolls inside of me. As much as I miss being pregnant... I would miss my baby Breck even more if he was back in there where he came from. Now, every day I'm reminded by sweet moments that I am very much Breck Reid's mama. And it is for real, baby.  For real. I'm a Mama! And I adore my job. 

These sweet moments that I run smack into every single day... are what I call "Mama Memos." They come out of no where, and I see them all the time. These are things I see that burns a fuzzy feeling in my stomach, creeps its way up into my heart, and reminds me... I am Breck Reid Buckingham's Mama. No one else in the world is this precious boy's Mama, but Me. Wow. I am in awe.

Mama Memo #1: Binky. 

[ In my mind, I could just envision a post-it note sitting beside this pacifier that read: Why is there a pacifier on your dining room table? Because you, Mama take care of me... you show me comfort by giving me this right when you know I need it... because you are my Mama! ]

Mama Memo #2: Out to dry.

[ I walked by the bathroom one morning and got that burning, fuzzy, bubbling love feeling when I saw Breck's sleepers air drying. How cute they were... all lined up in a row. Too quickly these little sleepers will be too small and will be folded and stashed away; stacked into "hand-me-down" piles. Time is flying. ]

Mama Memo #3: Prepared.

[ Why else would a girl have two extra pacifiers and baby socks in her purse? Because she's a Mama! Did I mention I love my job? And LOVE looking down into my purse and seeing these things. They just remind me over and over again... that I am living, loving, and doing my dream job every single day. ]

Mama Memo #4: Joined.

[ You know what this belly button makes me think of? Of course it is, hands down, the cutest little belly I have ever seen. His belly button (gosh, there has to be a more techical name for that) reminds me that there... right there at his belly button is how he and I were joined together while he was growing in my womb. For nine months, that is how is little body received nourishment in order to fourished, and grew, and grew, and grew into the 8lb. 14.5oz baby that I birthed! Simply a miracle. Only God could design something so amazing. ]

I'm sure there will be many more Mama Memos to come, since I see them every single day, but for now... that's what I've got.